UP

Purchased Disney Pixar's Up today :-)

With that said, I can't seem to find a theme for this here blog. So this will be the last post.

P.S. I'm not hard to find.

Cherish the Day

They Grow Up So Fast

*swear I had visions of him as an adult adjusting himself! Look at him, staring at his collar through the mirror!! My young man!

Lean In Right Quick

There's nothing like your kiss!!

Peace Has its Price

No matter what morals, values you have throughout this journey we call life, sooner or later you realize that you have to look out for yourself. Because those you thought were there for you aren't even there for themselves. & so what have you loved them for? HAVE you been loving them if they don't even bother to love themselves?

When it comes to your peace, your serenity YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT IT TAKES. Stand alone & there isn't anyone who can turn their back to you. Stand united & you're surrounded.

You got enough ammo?

Green Eyed Love

I prefer DCBG's posts than that other guy that isn't a blogger. Anyway that (or this below) is my favorite song of the moment!

& while browsing online about Mr. Hawthorne I discovered that he will be performing 30minutes away from me tomorrow night. So I'm going.

More info.

Testament

I know what it's like to not have you. Not just for a weekend, a couple weeks, almost a year I missed out on your life. I did the best that I could to see you again, to help you remember what we had. I don't know what I would do if I couldn't see you again.

Think about it.

I do not know what I would do if I could not see you again.
I truly do not.

But baby.. No. Not baby. My "big boy.."
I can't stop treating you as if I'm never going to see you again. That, in itself is a sign of weakness. As if I'm not sure enough I will always have you. I say this to myself a lot.

'You won't know strength if I am unable to show you it.'
& my (heart)beat goes on.

1963

& stretch

My aunt's turtle was supposed to be with us for a couple of weeks. I think it is ours now. I dislike it a lot. Today it did a neat thing though. Practiced some yoga.

Golden $tate

Like everyone should, I'm proud of where I'm from. But this (lack thereof) justice system. It gets a grip of your beliefs. Your morals. One begins to question when they'll get a Gold Star for doing a good job on staying true to self.

C.R.E.A.M.

Final thought(s): I never would have thought that I would have my ONE in the courthouse with me; accompanying my struggle. The American Dream. God bless the U-S of A. *burns United States flag*

Speed Your Love to Me

Another morning w/o my son, Andrew. As I stare at "my" room that looks like his [thanks to me] I find myself, yet again, on (an emotional) one. I was looking at pictures of him & I thought to myself, he's growing up. [Duh, right] I mean.

It's more like where did the time go? How old am I?

I just miss him & though he's away from me a few days each week, I want that time back! Like I want all those days. I want them all. I feel like I'm NOT supposed to be away. Granted, I'd probably ask for a break or 737 of them if he really was with me every day but. Still. His smile. His laugh. His embrace. Even when he's rough & tackles me when I'm least ready. Throughout his unecessary crying & irritating whines I Miss Him So Much. Because of my graveyard shifts, I come home around 6:15AM. He wakes up shortly after & I'm so tired. But I just got home now & boyy do I wish he was here so we can play.

Why?

Shit don't make any sense! I should be using this time to regroup & take advantage of him not being around & get some rest! Alas, I lay awake. Alone.

Oh, Love. In many ways you work to make me feel so good. & turn right around & have it hurt so badly.

Love, I can't get enough of you. I live for you, Love.

Love Always, Jennifer.

everLAsting

The more than deserving love to never be extinguished.

He said, "Lubb you.."

*8.27.9

We Know

If you feelin' lonely, I can be your one and only
I put it out in the world, so people show me... love

Potentially, wife material connectin' mentally
I felt like heaven sent for me, you're meant for me

This woman moves me and I'm a mountain of a man
You pull me in like the waves do the grain of sand

What we gotta do to make them see
We got a good thing going on
Wanna tell the world if they don't know
That what we have is real
Wanna shout it from the mountains baby
That I love you, but if they don't hear me
I know
You know
We know

*Talib Kweli/Faith Evans

Back In My Day

I always knew I'd end up sounding like my elders eventually. I even remember talking about K-EARTH 101 & the music on there & wondering what music would be on there as I get older. Anyway.. Chuck E. Cheese is not like it used to be. Even the food tasted better years ago. Nonetheless, I still managed to take great pictures of Andrew owning that place.

Caricature 4-5

Dependence, out

Once he was born, the following 10 months with her son taught her patience amongst the rushed times, taught her unconditional love amongst the constant hatred thrown at her, taught her appreciation despite her longing desire for something more.

She didn't have any worries, no bills or rent to take care of. At all. Food, always around. All she had to do was write it on a piece of paper & stick it on a fridge. Her mother-in-law would go to the grocery store & she'd go downstairs to find everything in her list, there.

Money was no matter. Matter of fact, she didn't have it. She never asked for much & as for clothes? She just wore the same things that her dad purchased for her 3yrs prior to her relationship he was against.

And yet, without any money the problems existed. Seeds of miscommunication, envy & abuse were planted. & boy did they grow strong & tall.

So let's think. A world without money. For better or worse?

I think a world without money would be a lot better. If we all used our skills & intelligence to help one another & not expect to get paid, just taken care of always. How beautiful does that sound?

Alas, I continue to dream. Dream of our independence. It's a nice thought to be consumed by, if just for a minute. Then we can forget how much we depend on many factors to survive.

Long live America.

Difficulties

SoulfulJenn: Man my ex got me tight
SoulfulJenn: I just called so I can talk to Andrew
βROOKLYN: WHAT HAPPENED?
SoulfulJenn: He gon say " Andrew u wanna talk to mama jenny?"
SoulfulJenn: THA FUCK IS MAMA JENNY?
SoulfulJenn: I'm not mama jenny!
SoulfulJenn: Tf is he doing man
SoulfulJenn: Smfh so of course Andrew's like no
SoulfulJenn: Cuz I heard him in thebackground sayin no
SoulfulJenn: So I told him can u please tell him it's mama because he doesn't kno me as that
SoulfulJenn: And he said sure he does then he hangs up
SoulfulJenn: I call again n said can I speak to andrew please
SoulfulJenn: He asks u wanna talk on thephone? Andrew says no I said can u tell him it's mama? He said I did I said no u never told him. He then asks Andrew if he wants to talk on the phone again
SoulfulJenn: He said no I just got off the phone
SoulfulJenn: Man.
SoulfulJenn: & I miss him a lot.
SoulfulJenn: *screams!*
----------------------------------------- 7:19 pm -----------------------------------------
SoulfulJenn: Got low batt, peace.
βROOKLYN: Wait

Most heart-touching..

My mother made a video that means a lot to me & it shows pictures of my town in Mexico as well as numerous of my family relatives. Rest In Peace Ma' Lupe.

Pleased to be Reminded..

Now at 3 years young, he sleeps in a pose he mastered at 3 weeks young.

Mr. Organizer

Sets his movies in a particular order then relaxes.

R.I.P. Ma' Lupe

Check it. My Ma' Licho (my Grandmother) w/my son Andrew, while we surround My Ma' Lupe (my Great-Grandmother) & myself. 5 generations, my mother's missing to complete the picture. THANK YOU SO MUCH GOD FOR ALLOWING HER TO MEET MY BABY BOY.

Just like I was a baby & my great-great-grandmother was able to hold me, Andrew was able to hang with his own great-great-grandmother. Lord, please take care of her.

Take care of us. Please calm me down. Please calm my tears. I need to be strong. It's just my brother Carlos & I here now & we need to take care of all these responsibilities. Please give me strength. I love you Ma' Lupe. I miss you. I remember we . Nah. I can't.

Motherly Love

I know why my mom liked this.

This song touched my heart. LISTEN.

www.MySpace.com/AyeBe

Song even made me cry.

Happy Mother's Day..!

Ever wonder..

Why in the most unexpected times you start thinking about someone you loved so dearly?

Te sigo queriendo " :] "

Dope Love Captured

Benihana's 4.17.9

*more to come!!

He's just so.. so..

Daggone behaved!

& handsome!!